CRITICISM PART 2

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If you live with hostility, you’ll learn to fight.
If you live with fear, you’ll learn to be apprehensive.
If you live with pity, you’ll learn to always feel sorry for yourself.
If you live with jealousy, you’ll definitely learn what envy is.

If you live with friendliness, you’ll learn that the world is a nice place to live in.
If you live with serenity, you’ll live your life with peace of mind.
If you live with honesty and fairness, you’ll learn what truth and justice are.
If you live with acceptance, you’ll learn how to love.

If you live with criticism,you’ll learn how to condemn.

If you live with criticism, you’ll learn how to find fault in what others do.

If you live with criticism, peace of mind will be far from you.

BE CONSTRUCTIVE.

CRITICISM.

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According to longman advance learner dictionary, criticism is denotatively define as a comment that show that you think something is wrong or bad.
Well if we look at this definition from the surface we won’t attach so much meaning to it, we will be like “well there is nothing bad in saying your mind about what you think is wrong”. But if we take a serious look at it, it carry so much power and meaning.

Let’s study this story.
Adpt from “quick to listen slow to speak” by ROBERT E. FISHER
Several years ago, while visiting my parent at their home in California, I had a chance encounter that left an indelible impression upon me. A man had come to my parents home to repair their automatic washer. As he was working on the machine I struck up a conversation with him.
In the course of the conversation, I happened to mention that I was a minister, lying on his back with his head out of sight at the back of the washer the man remarked rather disgustedly “I used to be a minister myself” he went on to say that he had been a pastor of a certain church in that city. My curiosity was aroused. I asked him the inevitable question, if you were call to be a pastor, how is it that you are now working as an appliance repairman?
The man rolled out from behind the washer, sat up and laid his tools as aside. He looked at me in the eye and spoke very deliberately “I will tell you why I got out of the ministry. I got sick and tired of some of the people in the church with their bad attitude and vicious criticism” he told me how some church leaders had been particularly critical of his wife and family. “It was bad enough when they criticized me” he said, but when they started on my kids, I decided that was too much.

When I finish reading the story myself I was left in awe. I now fully understand the destructive power of criticism. You see this criticism is like biting and devouring, at first critical words inject a form of venom in you that makes you vulnerable to other attacks. So when the attack is becoming too much your whole self submit totally and you get devour. Such is the case of the guy in that story.

HOW TO HANDLE CRITICISM.

1. Don’t take it personal.
The first step to take in handling criticism is to try not to take it personal. This is how to do it, when the critical word first get to you try not to think about it twice. Its when you ruminate over it that your inner mind process the words and accept it. So instead of trying to hold onto it and find where the critical word is coming from just try and shake it off instantly. Laugh it off.
One thing I’ve come to realize in this life is that no matter how good you are, no matter how generous you are. Someone out there will still not key into your philosophy so once you understand this simple fact critical words won’t bother you much.

2. Don’t respond.  
Many people will go with the idea of “don’t respond immediately” but I will rather suggest that don’t respond at all, you know why?. The more you respond to them the more you give them the opportunity to bite and devour you further. Just learn to ignore them.
Even Aristotle says “to avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing

3. Don’t quit
Don’t be like the guy in that story, he quit because he doesn’t know how to handle criticism.
This is one thing with quitting, when you quit you gave the people around you the opportunity to think that there’s an atom of truth in the bad things said about you.

When you are a giraffe and you receive criticism from a turtle, they are reporting the view from the level they are.
               -T.D JAKES-